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Swingers belong to more than two hundred clubs, subscribe to hundreds of magazines, surf thousands of swinger websites, and spend millions each year at conventions and vacation spots tailored to meet their interests.

No longer the "wife-swappers" of the '50s or free lovers of the '70s, swingers are a growing group of free-thinkers, mostly married couples between the ages of thirty and sixty, who have institutionalized their lifestyle and raised it from underground to where it now rests, comfortably just beneath the mainstream.

Although most swingers are still closeted, they are organized, informed, and working to gain economic and political power.

It is a public, grass-roots, heterosexual orientation among mainstream couples who have overcome the kind of loneliness, jealousy, and shame that adulterous marrieds endure.

The Thing About Swing About once a month, swingers from Northeast Ohio and neighboring states, many of whom subscribe to Cleveland-based Connection magazines, attend dances organized by the publications.

They come from as far away as Pittsburgh and Indianapolis to meet fellow sexual adventurers. The dance is "off-premises," swinger-speak for an event where no sexual activity is allowed on-site.

Many attendees book nearby hotel rooms for that. At last month's dance in Sandusky, sometime between the Macarena and the sex-toy giveaway, a curvaceous swinger with a page-boy haircut and a cover-girl smile notices an attractive couple looking at her across the table.

She locks her blue eyes on the man, Bill O'Brien, a Desert Storm veteran wearing a silver choker and a willing disposition, and dances over to his chair.

She straddles his leg for a few flirtatious moments before his pretty blond girlfriend, Heidi, joins in the fun. O'Brien rubs the page-boy beauty's bare thighs and continues rubbing as she switches to Heidi's lap.

The dancer flashes Heidi a bonus--a quick peek under her sweater, at two jiggling breasts the size of large mangos. All this before exchanging names.

Before brief, casual conversation. Before Bill and Heidi--and the playful flasher and her partner, a Cleveland stockbroker--go their separate ways.

Much of the activity at the dance is spontaneous and short, illustrating one of the unspoken rules of swinging: Flirtation is often an end in itself, not always a means to an end.

But it's special. In the book Burning Desires, journalists Steve Chapple and David Talbot announced that swinging in America had become a casualty to sexual sobriety.

Two health threats in a row--herpes and AIDS--scared couples away from swingers' clubs and parties. The Centers for Disease Control fueled the exodus in the mid-'80s, when it reported that two female members of a Minneapolis swingers club had contracted HIV.

It was later revealed that the women had had sex with bisexual men and had not spread the disease to fellow swingers. Still, public health workers expected the AIDS scare to hit the swinger community just as it hit the gay community.

So far, it hasn't. Swingers tend to believe that the heterosexual health threat posed by AIDS has been overblown in the general population and even more so in their lifestyle.

Though well aware of the dangers of casual sex, many believe they are not at risk because the disease is most commonly transmitted sexually by men who have sex with men.

This exempts most swingers, who prohibit gay and bisexual activity among men. The numbers support that view, though the risk of contracting the disease should still be a concern.

Despite the risk of sexually transmitted diseases, the use of condoms remains controversial in the lifestyle, especially among older swingers.

O'Brien, 29, who has been swinging for three years, says he uses them all the time. But another swinger at the dance, involved in the lifestyle for 25 years, says he never uses them.

Even though he brags about having intercourse with up to thirteen women in a single night, he insists he would rather not have sex than use a condom.

Particularly for female swingers, this has apparently not been a problem, according to sexologist Ted McIlvenna, president of the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco.

Though not a swinger himself, McIlvenna has studied swingers for sixteen years, and his institute has compiled sex histories on about 6, of them.

He attributes the lower-than-average rate of STDs among female swingers to a higher-than-average use of spermicides contradicting the medical research showing that spermicides are not reliable protection against HIV.

McIlvenna says women have also been able to protect their health by "institutionalizing" the lifestyle, formalizing membership, and sponsoring events that attract and keep a select clientele.

There was also a safety factor. They wanted to know who the people were that they were sleeping with, because of the fear of sexually transmitted diseases.

In the early '90s, swingers who were scared off by AIDS began to drift back, joined by a brand-new group of curious pleasure-seekers attracted via the Internet.

Websites enabled would-be swingers to avoid the adult bookstores--previously the only place to pick up swingers' magazines--and swing from the comfort of their computer terminals.

The magazines and websites are crucial. Swingers looking for partners place ads in the magazines, with or without photographs of themselves with or without clothing.

Most of these people are not fashion plates. Instead, they're sexed-up versions of your neighbors and friends--their love handles, cellulite, beer bellies, wrinkles, bald spots, and sagging breasts fully revealed, even if their faces often are not.

Editorial content varies according to the magazine, though Connection bills its publications as the official magazines of the lifestyle.

In addition to publishing reports from various swinger events, accompanied by nothing-left-to-the-imagination photo spreads, the magazines keep readers up to date on issues involving discrimination, political oppression, and changes in the lifestyle.

The websites' offerings range from explicit photo galleries and ads to informative articles about sexually transmitted diseases and the legal rights of swingers.

At www. There are websites for just about every swinger preference--for "soft swingers" who engage in sexual activity but refrain from actual intercourse with other couples, for under-thirty swingers, and for biracial swingers, just to name a few.

There is even a Liberated Christians website www. Many swing clubs have their own websites. A quick search for Ohio swing clubs turns up a helpful list of sixteen across the state, including a half-dozen in Northeast Ohio.

Some, like The Cleveland Connection, conduct "off-premises" activities such as the Sandusky dance, where sexual activity is limited to heavy flirting.

One on-premises club in Cleveland, The Love Shack, caters primarily to couples in their twenties and thirties, according to the owner, who asked to be identified only as Mike.

Groups typically start out socializing in the hot tub. The sex happens later, in any of the private rooms or group areas. An actual schedule for a typical party night: Guests Arrive Introductions Weekly Ice Breaker Game Hot Tub, Sauna, Private Rooms Open Dress Down [meaning participants must be wearing less clothing than when they arrived] Who Knows Mike says he used to interview couples before allowing them to participate, a practice frowned on by many swingers, who tend to despise discrimination on any level.

The club is currently on hiatus, because Mike does not have a girlfriend and because it "got to be too much of a hassle. I declined.

But if they're sneaking around on their wives or girlfriends. People drink too much and there's too much jealousy. Sitting on straight-back chairs, the group is smaller than she expected and traverses the entire spectrum of nervousness.

Thomas herself falls somewhere in the middle, even though she's given this same orientation talk countless times. Thomas routinely grants interviews about the lifestyle to the national print and broadcast media, including MTV's Real Sex this July.

But she still sees the nervous young mother she used to be--the one who 26 years ago submitted an ad to one of the twelve swinger publications she now edits--in the most apprehensive newcomer looking to her for encouragement and guidance.

Wearing a large picture of herself and her husband around her neck, along with a bright yellow pin that says, "Hi, I can't remember your name either," gives Thomas the event-coordinator look she's striving for.

At 48, classically attractive and approachable, Thomas could easily be the leader of a church retreat or a garden club.

Instead, the onetime self-professed "nice Catholic girl" of Irish and Italian lineage has become an icon in the swinger movement. She provokes laughter from the group when she draws attention to the hotel marquee, which reads "Welcome TCC.

But she advises participants to tell anyone who asks that it's alphabet soup for The Christian Coalition. Appearances notwithstanding, Thomas hasn't always been free of the religious guilt that hinders many women in the lifestyle.

I feel in my heart nothing is wrong with it. You're not hurting anyone. I don't think that God would send me to hell because I'm sharing my love with other people.

A number of competing swingers magazines also feature women editors, most of whom look like porn stars depicted in sex acts. Not Thomas. Although she appears in almost every issue, sometimes repeatedly, she's always smiling and well-covered.

She devotes most of her editorial space to answering letters, clarifying misperceptions about the lifestyle, and educating swingers on their rights.

I didn't know if that was a compliment. Women are the leaders who drive it. Biologically speaking, women can have more lovers and more orgasms than men.

But that isn't why they perpetuate the lifestyle, according to California sex therapist Hugh Wallace, a swinger himself who counsels swinging couples.

Their relationships are equalized, because the primary relationship undergoes almost a power shift in favor of the woman.

For swinging to work, a couple must predetermine their level of involvement, what activities they will engage in, and with whom. Wallace likens it to negotiating a contract, in which the more submissive partner in the relationship suddenly gains an equal role.

Women struggle more with feelings of guilt about having sex with multiple partners. The women who get over such feelings often become enamored with the social aspects of the lifestyle.

Sexologist McIlvenna, also a Methodist clergyman, says many organizational parallels can be drawn to the role of women in other institutions, including church groups, where women do much of the organizing.

Before the Sandusky dance, four couples meet at a local restaurant for dinner, mixing up the seating so that only one couple is still sitting together.

Affections are traded all around--a gentle squeeze on a thigh, a quick woman-to-woman kiss, and teasing that would be considered unacceptable in just about any other social situation.

It doesn't bother him that other men look at his wife's breasts, which she recently had enlarged by two cup sizes. As most couples in the lifestyle claim, they didn't start swinging to rescue a lagging sex life, but to improve an already good one.

Even though she doesn't mind sharing sex with another person, her facial expressions suggest she is unnerved by this intimate disclosure to a total stranger.

He continues anyway. I realized her fantasy was my fantasy. On the way home I asked if she wanted to stop at a strip club.

We had a girl dance for her, and that turned her on. They're now fully involved in the local swing scene. The lifestyle is equally social and sexual to them.

After events like this, they say, they only pair off with other couples about half the time. Try this sampling of attendees at last month's dance: a heart surgeon, an insurance fraud investigator, at least two people in higher education, a small business owner, a stockbroker, a former erotic dancer, an engineer, and a computer programmer.

A smattering of solid blue-collar professions was also represented. We live a dual life. The lifestyle cuts through social, religious, and racial divisions.

While swinging isn't recommended for couples with marital problems, sexologists say that it isn't unhealthy for happy couples who desire it.

The Greeks had several national orgies, including one in which participants dressed in goatskins, climbed to the top of Mount Parnassus, and had copious intercourse with one another.

The Roman members of the cult of Bacchus under Augustus Caesar had no fewer than five orgies a month. Partner-sharing also has a long history. It still happens in many cultures for political, economic, and purely sexual reasons.

One two-hundred-strong utopian society in upstate New York, called Oneida, abolished monogamy and lived in a group marriage in the s.

The arrangement apparently provided a good social structure to grow their prosperous flatware company, which still exists today.

There's some debate over the origin of the word "swinging," which encompasses both orgiastic activity and partner-sharing. Once inside the club you will be given a full tour of the club and all rules will be explained.

East, Cleveland Ohio We are Open! Club Escape follows all Ohio Corona Virus Guidelines including Social Distancing throughout the club and also wearing mask in the club.

Please make sure you wear your mask! Ladies when one is just not enough! Single guys we need your help as well - please remember that tonight and every night is ladies choice at Escape.

No always means No. Escape is the place where like minded couples and singles go to meet other like mined couples! Club Escape is taking every possible measure to provide the safety of our members and employees.

Everyone attending the club MUST wear masks. Like no other life style club in the country Club Escape goes above and beyond to keep our facility clean and sanitized.

Most clubs simply put a spray bottle and some paper towels in a room with a hard plastic mat. Next we provide a staff attendant to make sure every room is cleaned and disinfected after it is used and at the end of the night.

Members welcome back! We missed all of you. Please make sure you bring your Driver License and your Membership Card. Both of these are needed to enter the club.

New members Welcome! Please make sure that who ever is attending the club is 21 and older and brings a Driver License or State Id - both are requirements to enter the club.

You can register right at the door! All new members will be given a tour of the club upon your first visit. All our rules will be explained at this time.

If you have questions please ask. We want everyone to enjoy yourself while at Club Escape but rules are ment to be followed. The single gentleman that attend our parties mix in well with the couples and are polite and courteous.

Single Ladies attend Club Escape because the Environment is safe both inside and out! Escape is a non pressure club! So whether you are sexually mild or wild, a newbie or a seasoned swinger you will fit in and have a fun time.

We ask that you dress to impress! Guys Follow the dress code or you will not get in Guys you must be in a button up or collared shirt - no graphic tee shirts, hoodies, baseball hats, or bandanas are allowed.

Jeans, dress short, and dress hats are ok. Friday and Saturday night parties start at 8pm and we go till 2am. Our doors close at 12 midnight no one is permitted to enter the club after this time.

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Swingers like to compare their plight to that of gays, and in some respects it is similar. Outed swingers have lost jobs and friends.

Their clubs and events have been political targets. Their way of life continues to be attacked by church leaders, media, and politicians.

Swingers magazines and websites keep subscribers updated on the latest swing-club busts and oppression tactics of the authorities.

Although swinging is legal, clubs often get busted for alleged alcohol violations and other charges. Thomas says there haven't been any problems with clubs frequented by Cleveland swingers, one of which, The Play Pen in Linndale, is under careful scrutiny on Saturday nights by Police Chief Richard Kordick.

The Broward County Sheriff's Office in Florida, for example, started the year off on a swinger witch hunt, arresting 31 people at one private club in January and 24 swingers at another, citing them for lewd and lascivious behavior.

Unlike gays, who began to achieve political influence as more of them came out of the closet to demand that society respect their rights, swingers have shown little progress in this area.

A handful of designated spokespeople, including Thomas and McGinley, fiercely defend the lifestyle. But they are just as passionate about preserving the privacy of their fellow swingers.

But when they find out the couple next door to them are swingers, that hits close to home. Neighbors told their children to stay away from her children.

No trick-or-treaters visited for Halloween that year. At one point, her ex-husband lost his job as the manager of a restaurant.

Consequently, Thomas is very discerning about publicity. Though she's featured every month in magazines with a combined annual circulation of a half-million , in Ohio alone and appears on the cover of her book, she will not pose for photographs in local publications.

The inclination to stay closeted doesn't mean swingers will sit back and allow their lifestyle to be pummeled at the political or moral whims of politicians and bureaucrats.

The Lifestyles Organization of California, for example, led by McGinley, recently filed suit against the California Alcohol Beverage Control Board for trying to run the swingers group out of the state.

Closer to home, the parent company of Thomas's magazines, Connection Distribution Co. The company contested the law all the way to the Supreme Court, which refused to hear the case in April.

Thomas says her company will keep fighting the law, which allows the authorities unfettered access to the names and addresses of the magazines' advertisers.

The stated purpose of the law is to prevent sexually exploitative photographs of children from being published.

Thomas insists that all photographs used in ads are scrutinized before they are published and returned if there is any question about their legitimacy.

And the law infringes on the privacy rights of individuals, she says. Who am I or you or the Church to tell them they can't do something? Swing clubs cater to what any marketing professional would consider an attractive demographic: married couples with enough disposable income to spend on dances, conventions, travel weekends, specialty outfits to fit with party themes, and sex toys, among other necessities for serious swingers.

The people making money off swingers have traditionally been swingers themselves. Until now. McGinley claims swinger conventions infuse thousands, sometime millions, of dollars into local economies.

They have begun to attract sponsorship by some mainstream entities, including local tourist organizations, five-star resorts, and Air Jamaica.

The Desert Storm vet and his girlfriend have already retired to two adjoining hotel rooms with some friends from The Play Pen.

The vet later claims to have witnessed "things I've never seen before" in those two rooms, involving group-sex chains and strap-on penises.

By the dance's end, people who have failed to make connections have one last chance, at the hospitality room back at the hotel where Thomas spoke earlier.

Here, people are free to shed more of their clothing and be more sexually aggressive. But because the room is right off of the lobby, Thomas has decided that the hideaway beds will not be pulled out of the wall.

That doesn't seem to disappoint most of the couples. After a hard night of dancing and drinking, their moods have become less hopeful and more tired.

Most of the new couples are noticeably absent, indicating one of two things: They scored, or they went off to bed by themselves.

The remaining couples are scattered around the room, munching on pretzels and chips and making small talk. There's no guarantee they will connect with anyone here either.

Some eye the sex toys and pornographic films being peddled on the shelf, possibly as a fall-back. Still, it's not too late to make new friends or share jokes and stories from the evening.

The buzz of anticipation has not been replaced by the lonely desperation that pervades most singles bars at closing time.

Swinging couples are resilient, optimistic people. They know there's always next month's dance. And they always have each other.

Jacqueline Marino can be reached at jmarino clevescene. We welcome readers to submit letters regarding articles and content in Cleveland Scene.

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By Jacqueline Marino. They look like people you know. They are single and married and old and young and professional and blue-collar.

They sashay into the spacious ballroom, some hand in hand. They seem like middle-class America on a typical Saturday night in the heartland, headed for something about as titillating as a wedding reception.

Jump to comments 2. Cleveland Scene on Social Media. Most Popular Most Read. No recently-read stories. October , Most clubs simply put a spray bottle and some paper towels in a room with a hard plastic mat.

Next we provide a staff attendant to make sure every room is cleaned and disinfected after it is used and at the end of the night.

Members welcome back! We missed all of you. Please make sure you bring your Driver License and your Membership Card.

Both of these are needed to enter the club. New members Welcome! Please make sure that who ever is attending the club is 21 and older and brings a Driver License or State Id - both are requirements to enter the club.

You can register right at the door! All new members will be given a tour of the club upon your first visit.

All our rules will be explained at this time. If you have questions please ask. We want everyone to enjoy yourself while at Club Escape but rules are ment to be followed.

The single gentleman that attend our parties mix in well with the couples and are polite and courteous. Single Ladies attend Club Escape because the Environment is safe both inside and out!

Escape is a non pressure club! So whether you are sexually mild or wild, a newbie or a seasoned swinger you will fit in and have a fun time.

We ask that you dress to impress! Guys Follow the dress code or you will not get in Guys you must be in a button up or collared shirt - no graphic tee shirts, hoodies, baseball hats, or bandanas are allowed.

Jeans, dress short, and dress hats are ok. Friday and Saturday night parties start at 8pm and we go till 2am. Our doors close at 12 midnight no one is permitted to enter the club after this time.

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